Many of my blog posts include my new baby. He has become a part of my life. However, I have not yet taken time to write about what life is like with him! Before I forget, I want to document what is going on and what it is like to be a new mom as we are about to hit the 6 month mark!
The first 3 months with baby were pretty simple but strange. He was a tiny, thinly haired being. Generally he was asleep most of the time-and looked like my brother from certain angles which weirded me out. He did not have that new baby smell as we used scent-free products so that new baby smell is really all just marketing. Haha.
Being a new mom was not really THAT rewarding as there were no smiles and just basic interactions (him just opening his eyes each day was a much anticipated event) but I knew I was meeting his basic needs and still felt a bit in awe that he was mine! It felt amazing that I had created this person. I also felt extremely protective. He seemed so fragile. It may have been hormones, and it has passed now, but I found it very hard to share him (even with close family members). I would have loved to live alone and isolated just then. Hahaha. I also felt amazing love towards my husband who really had to step in and take care of us both the first month as I still had chronic pain from the nerve pain. All the c-sections issues were nothing and recovery was a breeze in that sense!
I did not breastfeed right away as it took 4-6 days for my milk to come in. By then the baby really liked the bottle and was too lazy to do the work to breastfeed. No matter how hard we tried he was not going to do the work. We knew we had a lazy one on our hands. I did buy a pump and gave him some milk via bottle but after awhile with the little amount I was producing, I threw in the towel. Breastfeeding seemed like total hell anyway so I cannot say I am unhappy with how it all played out.
I also had a period where I got a bit panicked just after 3 months! All the apps and sites were saying the baby should be doing certain things by now-and he was not. I worried about problems he may have. He was not smiling or making much eye contact. I worried he did not feel bonded to me. But, there was a distinct moment around Christmas in which baby looked up at the decorations hanging from the ceiling (thanks to my husband) and had a distinct smile and chuckle and I felt relief. My brother also talked some sense into me once which helped.
Around 5 weeks the vomiting began! This lasted about two months. He spit up after every feeding…a lot! After a lot of experimenting and going to the doctor we realized the medications were not helping but bought a thickened milk formula and a larger nipple size for his bottles. Then he was only spitting up once a day or so. The whole house was covered in towels during this time and laundry was a nightmare. Going out was hard as I was always worried about him spitting up. As he grew, things got better. However, he did have to go to the hospital for a week while they investigated why he was so skinny. Turned out to be a combo of all the vomiting and a fast metabolism. I already wrote a post about all that so will not get into it. But, he is all good now.
Around 4 months things began to change. He became suddenly alert. He noticed us and things and began to smile. It was adorable and everyone was working hard to get some smiles. We realized quickly he is demanding! He wanted milk when he wanted it and would cry furiously until he got it. He hated diaper changes and would shriek every single time. It seemed he hated being cold. We joked we need to move to the tropics. Other than those two things, he was a good baby and did not really cry. He was also a great sleeper and we actually had to wake him to feed for quite some time.
4-6 months has been awesome so far. He has stopped crying during diaper changes, finally! He laughs, plays, tries to touch things, knows people, and just recently has started to roll from his back to his stomach. On his stomach he is currently getting stuck and gets mad after some time and cries. It is so cute. He smiles all the time and once in awhile will laugh in a cute way. All these small things do not sound like a big deal but we are just living for them! He started to become vocal very slowly. He made coos, then blew a lot of raspberries, and now can scream in delight if he wants to. Helium balloons clipped to his legs really got him kicking and, though he hated tummy time at first, he finally got used to it.
In his stage right now he still gets very upset when hungry and is a pain when he gets tired. He gets upset and cranky and does not like to take his naps so we are working on that now! Recently we also started giving him some pureed food. It was messy. Just milk is sooo much easier and that stage should be enjoyed by new moms BUT eating is so cute. He did not know how and would move his tongue in the wrong spot and the food would come out. Now, just a few days ago he seemed to figure it out and sometimes even opens his mouth on his own to take in the food. Seeing such small progress is exciting.
As for me, I just love being a mom and realize it is not as hard as I expected (but I think this baby stage is fairly easy compared to when they get mobile…haha my husband will be the stay at home parent then). I am enjoying him a lot but it is also nice to get small breaks. My mom helps in the mornings if I want so I can take care of anything I need to do which is great. I do wish he would sleep in a bit later though!
I still find it strange to think I am a mom and am so grateful to have a long parental leave available to me but, for me, I have realized I do not need the full length of it. However, because my work is overseas, they cannot take me back quite yet so I will be enjoying time off until at least late August. It is amazing how my emotions, thoughts, beliefs, plans, and feelings have been changing since our little guy was born. They say it takes a year to get back to normal-whatever that means. For me, I know my life has changed forever and for the better.
I was never really a marriage and family person I thought. When I met my husband I jumped in, though, and, later, knew I wanted one child with him. Now that our little buddy is here I just want 100 more….something I never imagined I would say. Kids are so precious and lovely. I know I looked at my family in a different way after he was born. Although I will not have 100…another one may be on the horizon one day! Wow….who am I? 🙂