Yesterday I asked my sister to spend some one to one time with me and to go out for drinks. She was thrilled as we do not often get to catch up alone. Over a few glasses of prosecco and an appy, we had a nice long chat. She has been dating her boyfriend for a year now and is expecting a proposal to come in the next year or so. She is a bit bewildered by it all as she had a really bad marriage already that lasted two years and it left her a mess. However, she thinks things will be much different the second time around. In my experience all those who I have met who are on their second marriage always tell me how much better their second marriages are. I am sure everyone learns a lot from the first time around!
I updated her on my own marriage. My husband and I have had a bit of a tough week or so as we have been bickering and fighting quite a bit over small things that have led to larger arguments. I find that once we have an argument another few come before we are in a smooth patch again. I hate those rough patches, though.
My siblings were very critical of my marriage when it first happened and that bothered me. Mostly as it was a very sudden marriage to someone who was a stranger to them (we met abroad) and as they did not understand how difficult immigrating was for him. Once in a while it still does bother me (their assumptions or comments) and I have to learn to not let it bother me. Others are allowed to have their ideas and perceptions (right or wrong) and time will show them the truth.
We also talked about life plans, our other siblings, and our aging parents. We both felt the next 5 years will change our family in a major way. Scary and exciting at the same time. It was great to sit down with her one to one. I will be sure to make an effort to do it more often.