Thanks for the bad day, husband, and I hope you learnt your lesson…

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Every couple has one or two things in their marriage that can drive them crazy.  In our case, one of these hot topics is driving. I have had my license for 16 years and in that time I have had 4 tickets in total (including 2 international tickets!). They were all for speeding-but not excessive speeding. So, this is an average of 1 per 4 years. However, the first 3 were within the first few years of getting my driver’s license.

My husband, on the other hand, has been in this country for less than 3 years and has had more than 6. Also, in his own country, he had A LOT! I cannot even count (and those are the ones I know of because we were in a relationship at the time-who knows what he did before we met!).

I feel, that many people in Georgia are terrible and unsafe drivers. Now, some of this is the norm (traffic laws such as no drinking and driving and seat-belts etc are being implemented only over the last few years and are still only somewhat enforced) and some is cultural (which I will not get into). There is also a sub-culture of what I think of as stupid younger men who are obsessed with BMWs and Audis and other fast cars that drift and race…and often do so in cities with no consideration for others. I get that the country has no race tracks or spaces for this but still…at least go to an empty rural area instead of a crowded city. In fact, I believe it was only last year that an infamous Georgian street-racer (who had even caught the BMW company’s attention due his handling of his car) perished in a fatal car crash. He was greatly celebrated but I despised his behaviour. His viral videos were impressive to many but horrible for most and I would have hated to be a pedestrian in his city.

Anyway, since my husband moved here, I have done my best to drill into his head all traffic laws must be followed. Yes, I understand a bit of speeding can happen but not as much as he does. Certain speeds in certain locations are NEVER acceptable. Nor are dangerous U-turns at high speeds or “drifting” etc in towns and cities. We do have race areas for these purposes and time and time again I have asked him to limit these behaviours to those regions. I have harassed and harangued him. I have made him pull over so I can get out of the car and walk-at which point he promises to drive normal and does…for that day. It has lead to fights and tension in our marriage. Others have noted his driving and made comments and warned him to stop as he would inevitably get into big trouble. Speed is the leading cause of death in cars, after all.

Well, finally, on this nice day off that I had yesterday, he finally got his wake up call-or so I hope. His BMW is impounded for a few days and he has a hefty fine for excessive speeding in the city/town limits. He will also have to pay a huge amount to retrieve the car. All of this for 10 seconds of wanting to see his stupid car in action. I was furious. I know he knows his behaviour is wrong yet he continues to do it again and again and again. In the past he had a few tickets which he did not enjoy paying for since he knows the value of a dollar due to his difficult job but I guess the impact was not enough to teach him a real lesson. I am sooo mad but I can only hope he has truly learned his lesson this time.

I am, of course, very angry and disappointed and am venting on here to make myself feel better but these kinds of things do impact a marriage as well. I do not think he would be pleased if I was similarly irresponsible and cost our family a fortune…or worse. Due to all this, we have had a bad day and there is tension between us. I was in no mood to write this post or about this issue but I want to be more honest in this blog. As I said in a prior post, no one likes to get into all kinds of details about the negatives in their lives and marriages but I do not want to present a false and constant rosy picture either….so there you have it, here is some  of my real life nastiness.

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